Which trade, though

So listen, I want to open this post with an authentic, un-doctored picture from this month's Every Day with Rachael Ray because I'm afraid if I just described it to you it would sound like something that came to me in a fever dream and I would lose credibility as an intrepid explorer of surprisingly-popular monthly magazines.


Obviously this recipe is not a complicated one, it's all right there in that terrifying word jumble above, but you may find yourself hung up on the step where you are looking at two perfectly good, unmixed ingredients and wondering what you're doing with your life.

These feelings are normal

Press onward. Set it on the table as though it is food. Do not apologize to your family. Never apologize.

If all goes well, your reward will be thoughtful chewing, some quizzical looks, and a silent but deep-running distrust of you in your position as Emperor of the Kitchen. Take it in! Ahhhhh, summertime.

Also, good news, Rachael fact-checked the Guatemalan insanity pepper episode of the Simpsons and concluded that eating peppers will not in fact send you on a vision quest, thanks for that Rachael.


Anyway, I know I joke a lot about "child approval ratings" and such, but the fact is it's really important to find something wholesome and nutritious for young children, lest you raise some raggedy Dorito-butter monsters. My advice is to experiment with different colors and textures until you find something that clicks with your particular youngling.

Pictured: Ivy, with the Hummingbird Nectar that will sustain her throughout the hot season